It's 3.34am. In the midst of watching Grey's and I got distracted. Went to my old blog, and was checking out my really really old posts. Reading it and how things were then, flooded my thoughts. Someone please explain why I constantly torture myself like this. Like I could just shut up and do things that didn't involve all that thinking and going back in time, but NO, sometimes i itch to relive those moments and make things right. But so what if I made an effort, that wouldn't have been enough, and i know that for sure.Meeting you last night, didn't give me a gleam of sanguiness. None at all to be perfectly honest. It just felt nice to have you around and me able to hang out with no qualms whatsoever. Being able to talk about anything, well almost. And not wonder if we were gon' be at each others throats. Now that would've sucked considering how I didn't mind meeting you despite the past weeks cloying events. None the less it was better than expected. Hence i fell asleep with a smile on my face, with that gleam of hope, that things would eventually be ok. Now i'm talking 'platonic-ok', 'just friends-ok'. Nothing more. But then, i might have got it all wrong. At least I am hoping I am not wrong. Time will tell, and I don't want to expatiate too much about this. There's so much I want to say, none of which will do me any justice if i said it here. I think i need to go back to writing, instead of blogging. Need to get me a notebook, a diary. Whatever you call it these days. So much for saving the trees.
Now i wish i had done something really exhausting today, so i can fall right into a deep slumber. Bleah!
Sweet dreams world.
"We all think we’re going to be great and we feel a little bit robbed when our expectations aren’t met. But sometimes expectations sell us short. Sometimes the expected simply pales in comparison to the unexpected. You got to wonder why we cling to our expectations, because the expected is just what keeps us steady. The expecteds just the beginning, the unexpected is what changes our lives."
♥the trick is to keep breathing 11:34 AM